All I sense is endings, I feel like I can't hold on to anything I want to. Or perhaps I feel that I shouldn't, that if it is meant to end I must let it... for everyone's sake. I don't know if I have the will to make new connections, no one seems interesting, or honest.
Maybe I'll end up like her, building a life I enjoy and sharing it with no one.
I have this voice in the back of my head telling me, oh so matter of fact-ly, that I should end things myself since I see it coming to make it easier. Easier on me by being the one in control, easier on everyone else by being the bad guy. I very quiet hopeful voice tells me that I'm being silly and things will work out, that I'm only being pessimistic. I can't find a way to trust that, it just never seems to work out for the best.
All the worst comes to pass, weather you dread it or trust it will never happen. I thought I could trust people again.
Maybe I was right all long. Maybe I am better off alone.
No comments:
Post a Comment